Questions Week: What would you like to change?

What would you like to change about yourself?

I certainly know what I should change about myself. I should want to be more godly, more discerning, more self-controlled. I should want to become more loving and meek, service-oriented and hospitable. I should want to be more humble. And these are things I legitimately want. But they aren't the first things that come to mind.

When the pastor asked us Sunday morning what we would like to change (a question that I've heard posed hundreds of times), do you know what my gut reaction was? I want to know the future. I want to control the future. Specifically, I want to know my personal destination and control how I get there. In other words, I want to be God.

Well, glad we got that out in the open. To be sure, this isn't normally my knee-jerk reaction. I would normally say one of the first responses I listed (and sincerely mean it.) It's just that yesterday my career path seemed to become a bit muddled. Things didn't turn out the way I wanted or expected or hoped. And I was a bit confused. And in that confusion, I wanted answers. And to be honest, I wanted to be God.

For the record, wanting to be God- bad idea. Really bad idea. Like Lucifer-bad. Like introducing death to an entire planet and countless generations of people- bad.

And I've since repented. And instead of wanting to control the world and re-make it in my image and wanting to know all the answers, I've since understood that being God is not my place in the universe. I know my place. All man is like grass, the wind blows over it, and it is gone. I don't know the number of hairs on my head or the days of my life. I can make plans for tomorrow and say to myself, "I will go here" or "I will do business there," but really, in the end, all control is illusory. However, I know the Person who IS in control and who DOES have a plan. I just need to acknowledge Him in all my ways, and He will make my paths straight. That's how I want to change.

What would you like to change about yourself, really? Or what desires of yours did you realize were actually sinful ones? Or, simply, how has God changed you?