Three Star Night

Homesickness, Pt 1

I've never been homesick before. Maybe it's because I'm not generally a very sentimental person. Maybe it's because I've always been relatively close to home. And maybe it's because when I did leave home, a lot of the awesome people that made home awesome came with me.

Regardless of the reasons, homesickness was just never something I dealt with in the past. It's not even something I considered when moving. So when I was sad and miserable after the first day of orientation yesterday (for reasons completely unrelated to orientation or law school), I blamed my shower. I blamed the lack of convenience stores or grocery stores around. I blamed the sucky air conditioning. I blamed my apartment for being full of bugs. I blamed the fact that my room is a mess because I haven't had time to organize everything.

But really, I just really, really missed home.

This morning, I woke up feeling pretty much the same as before. But then I realized what I was feeling. I named it. Homesickness. Maybe I'm a bit of a nerd and have read too much young adult fiction fantasy novels, but I honestly do believe in "the power of name." Naming an emotion gives you power over it. Homesickness. Homesickness. Homesickness. I can't click my heels because I left my ruby slippers at home, but the charm still works. At the very least I don't have the feeling of "I don't know what I'm feeling and why" to compound my misery.

I find hope in that homesickness is something that can be overcome. New homes can be made. I have an awesome new roommate, and at some point, I'm going to find an awesome new church. New everything. Maybe I can get a newly remodeled bathroom, a new air conditioning unit, and a new grocery store closer to my apartment, too. It's ambitious hoping, yes, but hey, go big or go home. And since I've no home to go to, looks like we're shooting for the first.